An Orderly Account for You

With this in mind, since I myself have carefully investigated everything from the beginning, I too decided to write an orderly account for you, most excellent Theophilus, so that you may know the certainty of the things you have been taught. (Luke 1:3-4)

No, see, I've got a headache today, so I'm afraid you can't sit down. Do you know why I've got a headache? My son, see my son, he went and got a brand tattoo, not just a tattoo, he got a brand tattoo, a brand, and his grandfather, his grandfather from Belize, he laughed about it, he gave him that tattoo and then laughed about it. And my son, when he saw me he ran out of the house, he got out of there and when I see him next I'm gonna pay in South Central for them to rough ride his ass, so no, you can't sit down today because I've got a headache.

A man, on his way to work to Bristol Farms, wearing his work sweatshirt, asks to sit down. She refuses him too, starts yelling at him. He ignores her, reads the Gospel of Luke on his phone. She gets off the bus at the Federal Building, walking forward along the aisle of the bus, she says loudly to everybody and nobody in particular, Thank ya'll for your patience, I'm sorry, I had a headache today.